The Idea:
Finding out who you are and what you want is the most important step in achieving your life goals.
The Story:
You know why people hate the last trilogy of Star Wars? There are lots of theories: plot holes, politics, Star Wars fatigue, nowadays it’s seen as cool to hate things, etc.
But let me tell you the most important factor: they messed up the character of Luke Skywalker real bad!
Luke was the hero in the first trilogy (he was more or less absent in the second trilogy, which was a story that happened before Luke). He went through a classic Hero’s Journey. Luke was an idealistic and courageous farm boy with hidden Jedi lineage who yearned for adventure. He went on to become a Jedi Master who defeated the evil Empire and saved the universe.
Cool. Amazing. Masterpiece!
But in the third (and last) trilogy, the writers and directors did a complete 180 with the Luke Skywalker character. Now he’s an old, grizzled man hiding on a remote planet. Because he made a major mistake in his earlier years, he became bitter, regret-filled, and a total loner. He wanted nothing to do with the outside world, even when the fate of the universe was hanging in the balance. It wasn’t until the new heroine, Rey, lit a fire under him and got him out of hiding that he finally came out to amend his mistakes and face the consequences.
Now that’s stupid!
Why? Because you can’t just change a hero’s character like that. You just can’t! It not only negates all the storytelling previous movie-makers have done but also destroys all the investment fans have put into Luke Skywalker the character. It’s like one day Taylor Swift suddenly transforms into Britney Spears, or LeBron James starts to behave like Dennis Rodman. It makes no sense.
This is just bad movie-making.
If you look at all the movies and shows, the best characters are the ones whose characteristics and traits are consistent. They can be strong, weak, good, evil, funny, dull; it doesn’t matter. They know, and more importantly, we know:
Who they are
What they want
The stories can develop, and the characters can grow, but you can’t have a character be strongly one thing one day, then the complete opposite the next, like what they did with Luke Skywalker.
Here are more examples (spoiler alerts):
Well-written characters:
Jordan Belfort in Wolf of Wall Street: an arrogant, charismatic young man wants to make money and gain power. He ended up being a legendary business con-artist and drug addict.
Walter White in Breaking Bad: a smart and frustrated chemistry teacher who always thought he could be somebody, ended up being a narcissistic drug lord who destroyed everything.
Jon Snow in Game of Thrones: an honorable, brave, and idealistic bastard with hidden royal lineage who wanted to prove himself, ended up becoming the promised King who saved the world from an undead army.
Badly written characters:
Daenerys Targaryen in Game of Thrones: the young, ambitious, and inspiring mother of dragons who wanted to create a just world (amazing character for the first 7 seasons), did a sudden 180 in the last season and became an evil destroyer of the world. What were the writers smoking?
Draco Malfoy in Harry Potter: the evil, calculating antagonistic character, went from being Harry's primary enemy to a weak butt of jokes as the series progressed.
Are you a consistent character?
Alright, that’s enough about movies and shows. This also applies to the show of life. If you look at the people around you, those whom you admire deeply, you know who they are and what they want. It’s unambiguous and consistent. You are not confused because they are not confused themselves.
Now let me ask you about yourself:
Who are you?
What do you want?
The better and clearer you can answer these questions, the better your character is, and the easier you can achieve your goals.
And the opposite is also true. If you can’t give me a clear answer, then you are lost. You don’t even know what you want. You are probably chasing everything. One day you want to be a nice, helpful person. And the next day, you want to gain some swagger and confidence. One day you want to be a creative dreamer, and the next day you strive to be dependable and efficient.
And the worst of all, you will have a fickle mind and be easily influenced by what others say and believe, because you don't know what you should believe yourself.
One of the greatest tragedies in life is not knowing who you are and what you want.
It’s not too late:
Here is the good news. No matter your age or status in life, it’s not too late to find or define your character. It took me a while to do it, but I found it in my 30s, and have been living it since.
Who am I: I am a funny and ambitious guy who constantly sits on the knife edge of creative ingenuity and undisciplined mess.
What I want: I want to create art to impact the world and leave a legacy.
I’ve been living as this character since. All my work is built on this character’s strength. All my products are built to solve this character’s problems. I don’t pretend to be someone I’m not. I don’t waste time pursuing things that don’t align with my values and goals. I don’t associate with people who don’t vibe with my character.
It is truly liberating.
What’s your character?
Now, tell me in the comment section:
Who are you?
What do you want?
You can email me too. But limit your answer to 200 characters. The more concise and clear your answers are, the better it is for you to know yourself.
The Offer:
Don’t know who you are yet? It pays to network with those you admire and see what their characters are like. I talked to many mentors, learnt from them, and eventually became comfortable with who I am.
Today is the last day to enroll in the new 28-day camp - Be Social, taught and hosted by my friend and networking expert - Colleen McFarland. It starts tomorrow. She’s going to teach you how to network with other and be comfortable in social settings.